August 2023
I think no matter who you ask, they will have some complaints about the state of the world today. It can be scary when we think of the world our children will inherit. Most of the time I take solace in a future with Jesus where every tear is wiped away. However, there are times when I am reminded of the sheer number of people I know, including many relatives, who do not know Jesus. My heart hurts for them, and I cry at the thought of my children not being named among the children of God! While I know that it is God who must save them, I will do all that I can to "bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord." (Ephesians 6:4)
Parents are responsible for how their children are raised and what they are taught. This responsibility is given directly to fathers, but mothers are to be their helpers in this endeavor. This is why it is important for families to stay together. There is a reason that children from broken homes are named among those who are "at risk". Fathers need to be active in the lives and upbringing of their children. Study after study has shown that fathers are the greatest influence in their children's lives. Mothers need to be supporting that leadership. Wives that respect their husbands teach their children that their fathers are respectable. The two parent system is God's design, and it is how the family works best. A father that takes the role of protector and provider seriously, allows a mother to be the nurturer and manager of the home. This allows both parents to have more control over the instruction of their children, namely, it makes homeschooling an easily viable option for education. Those who usually object to homeschooling as impossible for their situation are those who do not have these roles in the home. However, even if you are in less than ideal circumstances, homeschooling is still possible.
I may run the risk of sounding like a conspiracy theorist, but the world is seeking to harm our children. 1 Peter 5:8 warns us to "Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour." This includes our children. You don't have to work hard to see schools, libraries, and other "kid-friendly " places promoting and celebrating sexual sin in a manner aimed at children. When they are young, children are very impressionable. Some parents are vigilant about how their kids use their phone, who they are friends with, and where they participate in extracurricular activities, but fail to take into account where they attend school. If your child attends school, that is where they will spend a majority of their most formative years. They will form bonds with teachers and seek to emulate them. They will hear many arguments against the faith that you are trying to instill. While it is true that you can still teach your children from Scripture and teach your family values during family worship before or after school, it is a constant battle. You are battling for attention as the school battles back. Public schools are run by the government. They are going to be promoting the agenda of the government. They teach theories as facts; they promote and glorify lifestyles that are condemned in Scripture; they normalize sin and embrace it as good. This is not a place where children should be sent away from the care, protection, and wisdom of their parents. Many argue from the view that their child will be a missionary in their school. However, we train missionaries in language, culture, and the religions of the region into which they are going. Some adults take years of study before they are sent out. New Christians are discipled and protected before being sent out to teach others also. A five-year-old has not the physical, mental, emotional, or spiritual maturity to combat all that they will encounter at school. Keep them home. Keep them safe. Train them in Scripture along with their other learning.
Beyond the obvious indoctrination, schools were also designed to produce quality factory workers. Creativity, independent thinking, innovation, and mastery are not traditional qualities embraced by schools. Of course, they now promote qualities such as higher order thinking and creativity; however, they are doing so within the established, broken system not designed for such skills. I still remember the pedagogy class I took during my undergraduate work that convinced me that homeschooling was the best education. My professor was discussing meeting children where they are and teaching them for the purpose of mastery. The argument was made that we should be seeking to help students grow from where they are, rather than giving the same instruction to all students. As we discussed individualized instruction, I realized that is exactly what homeschooling provides. Who better to provide instruction that meets the learners needs and interests than their parents! Even a large family has smaller class sizes than most schools. Parents can take time with children one-on-one as well as learning together as a whole group. Parents can decide what they teach and how it is taught. Every state in the USA allows homeschooling. Some states may have more strict requirements, but it is possible. While a quality Christian school may align with you doctrinally, they still have your children for a significant part of the day and cannot provide as individualized instruction as you can at home.
Homeschooling doesn't have to look the same as a traditional school. Young children have a shorter attention span, so it is okay to start with sit down learning sessions that are in 10-15 minute increments. Young children learn a lot through play, so allow them various play opportunities throughout the day. As children get older, they can have more sit down type work such as reading, writing, and arithmetic. My teenager can do most of her learning independently now. She reads the lesson and completes course working, coming to me with questions as they arise. As I check her work, I may pull her back for some more direct instruction for concepts that she seems to be struggling with or had misunderstood. Learning is both an all-day, life-long process as well as a shorter demand on time in the day. Homeschooling allows you to incorporate real life lessons along with "book learning". There is much more flexibility with your day and time than when children are gone to school for 8-10 hours of their day (sometimes more for extracurriculars). What students are taught can be determined by their parents and driven by their interests. This means less tug-of-war for their hearts, minds, and souls. This also means greater enjoyment in learning.
The social aspect of homeschooling is regularly called into question. However, the artificial and detrimental nature of school socialization is rarely acknowledged. I would argue that homeschooled children who regularly interact with people of all ages have more balanced and regulated social skills than those who go to school and are socializing with only those within a close age range to themselves. Homeschooling doesn't require staying at home all day every day. There are plenty of opportunities for children to be involved with activities or to travel for learning experiences that allow them to interact with others. In fact, they may even have more opportunities for social interaction than those who are regularly limited in their discussions, told what to discuss, and have to walk in line and raise their hand to meet basic needs such as using the bathroom. As a teacher, I regularly heard students ask when they would need to know something "in real life". Schools are artificial learning environments. Real life learning not only allows children to learn the same or more lessons, but it is also in context. Students are solving real problems and interacting with people in authentic ways that will be more memorable than a simulation.
Homeschooling isn't easy. It isn't less expensive. In fact, some days it can be harder and more expensive. Just as living on one income requires sacrifice and prioritizing, homeschooling often requires the same. Some states have very strict requirements for homeschoolers that require parents to "jump through hoops" or have extensive paperwork in order to homeschool. I believe it is worth it. The time with your children alone is worth it. It is also a blessing to be the one to see them understand or discover something for the first time. Extra snuggles during read-aloud times are worth the extra planning of one-on-one time with each child. Extra dishes are a price worth paying for a slower-paced healthy lunch where fries aren't vegetables and my kids have more than 15 minutes to eat during the time that doesn't double as the only social time of the day. Our schedule can be flexible and we can take our breaks when Dad has a day off work. Our schedules always line up with his so we can enjoy our time off together as a family. We can also take our vacations at times that are less crowded because others are back in school. I understand extenuating circumstances. I was a single mother for 8 years. I chose the easy route of putting my child in school since I was teaching and we would be in the same place at the same time. I saw her lose her love for learning. I saw her fall behind in one subject because she was good at another. I saw her passed over for extra help because she wasn't as needy as others. I saw her come home with questionable book recommendations and new words learned from "friends" at school. I just assumed homeschooling wasn't possible because I had to work. There are more and more work-from-home opportunities and other jobs that allow for more flexibility and ways to homeschool even if you have less-than-ideal circumstances. I understand that not everyone will be able to make it work. Not everyone has supportive friends and family who can help them on the journey. However, take the time to at least consider if it could work for you. Those of you who are providing your children with a two-parent home, those who desire to train up your children in the Lord, why don't you homeschool?